[Since he's moved out, she hasn't spoken to him. She doesn't even know where he's staying. It might be better that way, but given what just barreled into her, she can't say nothing.
He's their family, too.]
Torgal is here.
[And she's overjoyed despite the fact that it could mean he's dead. She's overjoyed that this might mean needing to face Clive, but it would be unfair to Torgal to keep them apart.]
He's their family, too.]
Torgal is here.
[And she's overjoyed despite the fact that it could mean he's dead. She's overjoyed that this might mean needing to face Clive, but it would be unfair to Torgal to keep them apart.]
[He’s thrilled and terrified in equal measure by her username popping up, but the contents…
His reply is quick: ]
Please, Jill. Would you allow me to see him?
His reply is quick: ]
Please, Jill. Would you allow me to see him?
Thank you. I’ll be there as quick as I can.
[He’s put on his boots slower in actual emergencies. The sprint several blocks over isn’t lazy, either.]
[He’s put on his boots slower in actual emergencies. The sprint several blocks over isn’t lazy, either.]
[Jill is seated at a park bench, watching Torgal's ears. He senses Clive before Jill can even see him, ears up and tail slowly wagging before he takes off at a sprint to barrel into Clive once he's closer, less delicate than he was when he bounded into Jill.
Jill stands, but stays where she is. Seeing Clive from this distance is already difficult. She needs a moment before she can speak to him face to face again.]
Jill stands, but stays where she is. Seeing Clive from this distance is already difficult. She needs a moment before she can speak to him face to face again.]
I forgive you even tho I now must fix this inbox page to look nice
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rosarianoath
2023-12-09 10:34 pm (UTC)(link)
[Clive meets his hound head on, sliding down to one knee, arms out. Torgal nearly knocks him over, a couple hundred pounds of compact wolf muscle and dense fur overwhelming him as he laughs, relieved. When he staggers back to his feet properly, Torgal turning a tight circle around him, he puts his hands out to scratch his best boy behind the ears, along his cheeks.
He scarcely spares a glance for Jill, part shame, part distraction. The smile on his face is briefly broad, completely genuine.]
Oh, Torgal. How I’ve missed you!
He scarcely spares a glance for Jill, part shame, part distraction. The smile on his face is briefly broad, completely genuine.]
Oh, Torgal. How I’ve missed you!
[Even from a distance, she can't remember the last time she saw him smile like that.
It hurts.
She watches as Torgal soaks up the affection, and then breaks away to take a few steps back towards Jill. Attempting to lead Clive to her with a low whine.]
It hurts.
She watches as Torgal soaks up the affection, and then breaks away to take a few steps back towards Jill. Attempting to lead Clive to her with a low whine.]
[It’s impossible not to let his eyes follow Torgal to her — her delicate face, her frozen expression. His heart seizes, even as it swells, and he follows Torgal those few steps, hand still on the hound’s back.
He wants to gaze upon her forever, his eyes drop. Sadly:]
Ah… I wish there was a way to explain this to you…
[He kneels down again, getting his fingers in Torgal’s scruff to tug the wolf’s attention back to him.]
You’ll keep her safe when I’m not around, won’t you, boy?
He wants to gaze upon her forever, his eyes drop. Sadly:]
Ah… I wish there was a way to explain this to you…
[He kneels down again, getting his fingers in Torgal’s scruff to tug the wolf’s attention back to him.]
You’ll keep her safe when I’m not around, won’t you, boy?
[The longer she watches them, the more her heart aches. She's had a thought, a terrible thought, that perhaps he deserves to be alone. But seeing him with Torgal, the joy, and how he talks to him now...
He doesn't deserve that.
Torgal, meanwhile, tilts his head at Clive and his tone before trying to take another few steps towards where Jill stands, still determined to have both his people in one easy to watch spot.]
He doesn't deserve that.
Torgal, meanwhile, tilts his head at Clive and his tone before trying to take another few steps towards where Jill stands, still determined to have both his people in one easy to watch spot.]
[Clive lets Torgal go, a deep sigh on his breath, his eyes reluctantly going up to Jill. He misses her terribly, and she’s so close he could sweep her up, if it was fair to.
His smile to her is tight, polite. He wants it to be more but he can’t hurt her that way. There’s a long pause.]
You need his company. He’s always been your hound, in a broad way. I won’t ask to take him from you.
His smile to her is tight, polite. He wants it to be more but he can’t hurt her that way. There’s a long pause.]
You need his company. He’s always been your hound, in a broad way. I won’t ask to take him from you.
Edited 2023-12-09 23:10 (UTC)
[There's no smile on Jill's face as she regards Clive. Her hands are stuffed into the pockets of her navy blue coat, though one does come out to stroke Torgal's snout when he looks up at her.]
You don't need to ask, Clive. He should stay with you. He would be happy at your side, hunting. Wouldn't you, boy?
[Torgal knows what hunting is, and there's a wag of that tail.]
You don't need to ask, Clive. He should stay with you. He would be happy at your side, hunting. Wouldn't you, boy?
[Torgal knows what hunting is, and there's a wag of that tail.]
[Clive slowly straightens up, leaving the respectable distance between them.]
You saw how small my apartment is.
[He doesn’t want to talk about this, negotiating where their precious friend should lay his head at night. Torgal leans into Jill’s touch like he can’t get enough of it.]
Where did he come from, anyway?
You saw how small my apartment is.
[He doesn’t want to talk about this, negotiating where their precious friend should lay his head at night. Torgal leans into Jill’s touch like he can’t get enough of it.]
Where did he come from, anyway?
[Clive slowly straightens up, leaving the respectable distance between them.]
You saw how small my apartment is.
[He doesn’t want to talk about this, negotiating where their precious friend should lay his head at night. Torgal leans into Jill’s touch like he can’t get enough of it.]
Where did he come from, anyway?
You saw how small my apartment is.
[He doesn’t want to talk about this, negotiating where their precious friend should lay his head at night. Torgal leans into Jill’s touch like he can’t get enough of it.]
Where did he come from, anyway?
[Ah. So he went back there. She frowns, scratching Torgal and never tiring of it. She's missed him, too. He deserves better than the confines of their apartments.]
I was out in the woods. He nearly made me jump out of my skin, running to me at a full sprint. I don't know if he's just arrived or if he's been out there for a while, but...
[He's here now. Jill sighs, looking to Clive. Resisting the urge to step closer and bury her face against his shoulder, but she can't be that person again.]
We need to figure something out.
I was out in the woods. He nearly made me jump out of my skin, running to me at a full sprint. I don't know if he's just arrived or if he's been out there for a while, but...
[He's here now. Jill sighs, looking to Clive. Resisting the urge to step closer and bury her face against his shoulder, but she can't be that person again.]
We need to figure something out.
[How painful, to have her sigh like that, looking at him. His polite smile dwindles, wanting nothing more than to feel the fierce joy in his heart at reuniting with Torgal, needing to moderate himself down to not upset her.]
Neither of us can truly be without him. It wouldn't be right. But, as to not intrude upon you... perhaps we trade off, every few days. Or every week or two, if that's too often for you.
[They certainly can't send him between them on his own, not in a place where he could be mistaken for a monster.]
Neither of us can truly be without him. It wouldn't be right. But, as to not intrude upon you... perhaps we trade off, every few days. Or every week or two, if that's too often for you.
[They certainly can't send him between them on his own, not in a place where he could be mistaken for a monster.]
He nods, sober, a man resigned to taking whatever grace he can get.
"Every week," he agrees. "And if it isn't too much trouble, I'd like to spend some time with him today, before we, ah... trade. Again."
"Every week," he agrees. "And if it isn't too much trouble, I'd like to spend some time with him today, before we, ah... trade. Again."
It's odd to think this is the most they've spoken in almost a week. Clive nods again.
"I can make do, unless you want to take him first."
Torgal's mere presence makes the distance between them feel perilously wrong, considering how often the wolf has curled up at the foot of their bed while they made love.
"I can make do, unless you want to take him first."
Torgal's mere presence makes the distance between them feel perilously wrong, considering how often the wolf has curled up at the foot of their bed while they made love.
"You'll have him first. I don't mind," Jill says. She hasn't been alone until she's wanted to be. Jill doubts Clive has such caring confidants available to him, and so it might be the kinder thing, to let him care for Torgal first.
It's so difficult to be anything but kind to him, even after how he's hurt her.
It's so difficult to be anything but kind to him, even after how he's hurt her.
Relief floods him –– relief he didn't know he needed, and a fear he didn't realize he was bracing himself for. It has him drawing a sharp breath.
It's been so fucking lonely.
"If you're alright with it," he says, anyway, already imagining laying on the floor for hours with Torgal. Going for a run. Hunting. Anything, just to have company. "Thank you, Jill. I really appreciate it."
It's been so fucking lonely.
"If you're alright with it," he says, anyway, already imagining laying on the floor for hours with Torgal. Going for a run. Hunting. Anything, just to have company. "Thank you, Jill. I really appreciate it."
"Of course," he agrees. It is a very small apartment for a hound used to romping through the countryside. But as much as he wants to linger in the conversation, he knows she wants little to do with him, so that means clarifying: "I can take him elsewhere, if you want to enjoy this park alone."
Jill shakes her head.
"Stay. I was going to go," she explains, but it's all for what he thinks: she wants little to do with him.
She'll only be counting down the days to see Torgal, she tells herself. She crouches before the sitting wolf, scratching under his chin.
"Be good, boy. I'll see you soon."
"Stay. I was going to go," she explains, but it's all for what he thinks: she wants little to do with him.
She'll only be counting down the days to see Torgal, she tells herself. She crouches before the sitting wolf, scratching under his chin.
"Be good, boy. I'll see you soon."
Clive nods, keeping his distance and looking away while Jill says her goodbyes. Shame builds, but he’s growing used to it.
“Next week, then,” he says. He puts a hand out to her on reflex alone, and withdraws it before she can give him even as much as a look. “Be well, Jill.”
“Next week, then,” he says. He puts a hand out to her on reflex alone, and withdraws it before she can give him even as much as a look. “Be well, Jill.”
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