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"That may be," he says. "But on further reflection, we would need to bathe Torgal far more often than he'd tolerate or we'd enjoy."
"I don't care for it, but I do not dislike it," he clarifies.
"I suppose it is boyish," he replies, amused. "But how can I help it? It's a good time."
"It is. I'm always happy to watch the two of you," Jill tells him, but surely he knows. She's sat and watched the two of them wrestle and roll around in the grass more times than she can count, and yet not enough.
"I'm glad he's here with us."
If he wasn't, she's not so sure they would have bothered to try and salvage their friendship.
"I'm glad he's here with us."
If he wasn't, she's not so sure they would have bothered to try and salvage their friendship.
He's looked up more than once to see her gazing at them through the window, or from the back porch. It's embarrassing every time –– as if she's never seen him acting without dignity and there's some illusion about it he cannot shatter.
"I am too," he says. "He's a good boy."
"I am too," he says. "He's a good boy."
Jill holds his arm a little tighter.
"I hope you never think I'm not glad that you're with me, too." Not the implication that they're dead, of course, but she is glad that he's here despite the heartache they've endured. She never wants to live a life without him in it, somehow.
"I'm very happy right now, Clive."
All they're doing is walking, but she wouldn't want to be anywhere else.
"I hope you never think I'm not glad that you're with me, too." Not the implication that they're dead, of course, but she is glad that he's here despite the heartache they've endured. She never wants to live a life without him in it, somehow.
"I'm very happy right now, Clive."
All they're doing is walking, but she wouldn't want to be anywhere else.
Right now, the grimmest parts of his mind want to repeat, but he doesn't voice those ugly thoughts. She does love him, and it's the greatest tether he has. He looks down at her, expression softening briefly.
"Oh, Jill," he murmurs. "I'm glad you're happy, and glad to have you with me."
"Oh, Jill," he murmurs. "I'm glad you're happy, and glad to have you with me."
"I've missed my dearest friend."
She loves him so much she will endure whatever pain comes from doing so. Regardless of their relationship, she's trying to remind herself that before anything became complicated, that's what he was--her friend, when everything else seemed cold and frightening.
"And I promise to not work you to the bone in the garden."
She loves him so much she will endure whatever pain comes from doing so. Regardless of their relationship, she's trying to remind herself that before anything became complicated, that's what he was--her friend, when everything else seemed cold and frightening.
"And I promise to not work you to the bone in the garden."
She is his friend, certainly, but something about their relationship makes it feel like it isn't a strong enough word. Are you really just friends with someone you grew up with, someone so special you can recall the first moment your fingers brushed? The first time you saw her cry, the first time you decided any blow was worth taking if it meant shielding her? Clive swallows his breath and nods. He never wanted to stop being friends.
"I appreciate that," he says, but he knows in that instant that he'd do it anyway just for her. "I do not want to be so distant from you ever again."
"I appreciate that," he says, but he knows in that instant that he'd do it anyway just for her. "I do not want to be so distant from you ever again."
He is the love of her life, but she can't say it aloud without him looking guilty for it. For feeling like he failed her--and he has, in a way. But she wants to hold onto this precious moment between them for as long as she can.
"Never. I know I still belong by your side, and it's where I wish to be as long as you'll have me there." Not as a lover or wife, a fantasy left behind, but as a friend.
"Never. I know I still belong by your side, and it's where I wish to be as long as you'll have me there." Not as a lover or wife, a fantasy left behind, but as a friend.
He takes her hand off his elbow, firmly moving it so he can hold her hand instead. His fingers lace with hers tightly.
"And that's where you'll stay," he assures her.
"And that's where you'll stay," he assures her.
I'm interested already. What is your need?
[The odds that it wouldn't be enjoyable seem slim at most.]
[The odds that it wouldn't be enjoyable seem slim at most.]
[ For your strength and beauty to distract me. she thinks but doesn't offer up so freely. ]
Hunting, for one. It seems certain protections failed in my absence and my private storage was ransacked. I won't waste your time with the lesser beasts, I recall your desire for challenge.
[ Which is why she adds: ] I also plan to make another venture into the mountains. Your particular talents would be invaluable.
Hunting, for one. It seems certain protections failed in my absence and my private storage was ransacked. I won't waste your time with the lesser beasts, I recall your desire for challenge.
[ Which is why she adds: ] I also plan to make another venture into the mountains. Your particular talents would be invaluable.
I have no quarrel with going after small game if it spares you the tedium, but a challenge is always welcome. As are the mountains –– would we be out there more than a day, you think?
That would be generous of you, I'll consider it. As I said, I don't desire to waste your time or your skill, and would rather offer you challenge or at the very least more worthwhile hunts.
It wouldn't be my intent to be more than a day, but that may depend on the weather and what we find. I saw a number of abandoned mines and caves, which interest me. Obviously not the safest of places in the wilderness but at the very least I should be able to portal us out if necessary.
It wouldn't be my intent to be more than a day, but that may depend on the weather and what we find. I saw a number of abandoned mines and caves, which interest me. Obviously not the safest of places in the wilderness but at the very least I should be able to portal us out if necessary.
A simple question about his day has turned into a pleasant surprise. He seems happy she asked, and that joy she sees in the depths of his blue eyes just makes her want to ask more. And so she does, and before she knows it, he's telling her about that show he's been watching and she's nodding along and smiling. Does she follow all that he's explaining? No. But she enjoys listening to him talk, and he has her full attention as they sit on the couch, focus entirely on him.
She's glad he can find happiness in the little things. He deserves whatever he can find.
In the natural lull of conversation, she reaches for Clive's hand. She doesn't want him to stop talking, but it feels rare to have him upstairs in the living room when the sun is shining. Surely he'll try to leave to go take a nap or prepare before it's time to hunt. She looks down as she laces their fingers together, biting down the selfish desire to ask him to stay.
She's glad he can find happiness in the little things. He deserves whatever he can find.
In the natural lull of conversation, she reaches for Clive's hand. She doesn't want him to stop talking, but it feels rare to have him upstairs in the living room when the sun is shining. Surely he'll try to leave to go take a nap or prepare before it's time to hunt. She looks down as she laces their fingers together, biting down the selfish desire to ask him to stay.
Consider it a warm-up. There is no such thing as a waste when one is out in nature.
[The second part he has to ponder. Jill would have opinions on him leaving for more than a day, but he's content to take any excuse to be outside of the city for as long as possible. He'll make of it what he can.]
I've descended into dangerous places with far lesser means of rescue, so I am happy to pursue whatever interests you. Though I confess to being curious... what interests you about an abandoned mine?
[The second part he has to ponder. Jill would have opinions on him leaving for more than a day, but he's content to take any excuse to be outside of the city for as long as possible. He'll make of it what he can.]
I've descended into dangerous places with far lesser means of rescue, so I am happy to pursue whatever interests you. Though I confess to being curious... what interests you about an abandoned mine?
The afternoon has gone surprisingly well. Hours ago, he felt himself hesitating to reply, privately expecting the other shoe to drop after saying the wrong thing, but now talking to her flows like water. It's rare to see her so interested in his day-to-day; he's not sure what's changed, but as long as he has her attention, he'll take it.
"Well," he says, looking down at their hands. He wraps his fingers around hers in turn, his gentle grip swallowing her hand up. He looks at her slender fingers for a beat before looking back to her, a little smile sneaking onto his face. "I ought to lay down if I expect to go out tonight... but I regret having to leave when I enjoy your company so much."
"Well," he says, looking down at their hands. He wraps his fingers around hers in turn, his gentle grip swallowing her hand up. He looks at her slender fingers for a beat before looking back to her, a little smile sneaking onto his face. "I ought to lay down if I expect to go out tonight... but I regret having to leave when I enjoy your company so much."
"You can lay down and we can continue talking until you fall asleep," Jill offers with a little smile of her own. This moment feels too precious to let go of easily, but the tighter she holds onto it, the more she worries it will break. "We can talk about something dull. Like fertilizer. I'll knock us both out."
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